Chapter by Chapter - Educating the Wholehearted Child Ch. 3

Education. . .Strengthening Your Child's Mind

"Your child is not just a soulless brain that needs to be filled up with facts by a teacher, but a person in relationship with you and God, who has eternal value, dignity, and purpose because he or she is made in the image of God." pg. 43

When I started homeschooling and began to use materials that included God's hand in creation, science, history, etc. It really opened my eyes to how dry, void and empty my own education had been without these concepts at the core of all that I learned. I am learning so much along with my kids and feel all the richer
for it.

It often seems that the world lacks value for heart of the child. Everything is rush, rush, rush, do more, be better, success is material, popularity is a milestone, money is the key. It saddens me. I can't figure out if I'm just getting older and thus my perspective has changed or if it was this way even when I was young. Does it seem like more and more people live vicariously through the successes/stature of their children and feel like more or less of a parent accordingly?

I thought this chapter reiterated the importance of a child knowing "how" to learn. The Clarkson's focus on developing this ability via these seven mental muscles: habits, appetites, language, creativity, curiosity, reason, wisdom.

habits - of attention, excellence, orderliness, truthfulness, self-control, diligence

appetites - for literature, living books, art, music

language - print rich environment, limited TV

creativity - provide tools, free time, imagination, guidance, model

curiosity - a thirst for knowledge

reason - dialogue, problem solving, opinion formation, thinking

wisdom - discernment, understanding, prayer, stewardship

I find myself weak in the training of habits. In fact I probably unwittingly nurture to the contrary by giving in, not expecting obedience the first time, failing to follow through and I could go on, but why self-deprecate? lol! It takes unwavering diligence and perseverance to "train" your children in the manner the Clarkson describe and I'll admit I sometimes (okay often) feel I fall short here.

As I was reading last night, I contained my irritation that arose from my husbands constant channel surfing. He didn't watch anything for more than a minute or two. I wondered to myself, if this was a good example of how we actual train ourselves to be inattentive and unfocused? These days we have video games, 50-60 channels, internet, ipods, cell phones, etc. It's a constant busyness - a world infracted by an epidemic of multitasking :-) What ever happened to good ole down time? or as my father would have called it - peace and quiet!

Anywho, this quote was certainly food for thought:

"A love of reading is an acquired taste, not an instinctive preference. The habit of reading is formed in childhood; and a child's taste in reading is formed in the right direction or wrong one while he is under the influence of his parents; and they are directly responsible for the shaping and cultivating of that taste."
H. Clay Trumbull, Hints on Child Training, 1890

Well how's that for laying a burden at your feet? I remember my older sister was an avid reader and my parents would literally nag her for reading - saying she "always had her nose in a book", like it was a bad thing. Lucky me, I wasn't an avid reader then :-) but as an adult when I think back to the message that sent
- their attitudes and behavior fostered a disdain for books, not a love. Don't worry though - she kept reading! I think it was her escape by then. I wish my parents would have know and been able to pass on what a blessing and adventure reading could be - I might have journeyed to Orchard Valley with Jenny Wren or to the barn with Wilbur and Charlotte long before I was "this many" years old. lol!

I have to agree with Trumbull's quote and propose further - that not only in literature, but in many other aspects of life, we either cultivate a love and interest for something - OR we, by lack thereof, leave it dormant in the imagination where it may never be ignited.

"We have never been so rich in books. But there has never been a generation when there is so much twaddle in print for children." Charlotte Mason, Home Education, 1935

Oh, don't you think Ms. Mason would just fall out of her chair at what's available today? Hmmm. . .enough said.

"Don't be stingy on your library - have as many books at home as you possibly can. Leave them at strategic reading spots throughout the house." pg. 48

Noble idea and one I encourage, but honestly some kids need something a little less subtle - don't they?

"There is definitely a link between vocabulary and intelligence.The best ways to increase your child's vocabulary is to read good books aloud. " sidebar pg. 49

I concur! Between reading good literature to my children and taking in the wisdom-filled posts I encounter , my own vocabulary has expanded.

Well in the closing remarks the lesson was brought home - our children are apt to do as we 'do", rather than do as we "say". Likewise we set the pace for learning. . .

Do your children see you reading for pleasure? Do they see you choosing television programs that are beyond mediocre? Do they see you using your creativity? Do they see you seeking God's wisdom?

"One of the extra benefits of home educating is that it restores to the whole family the excitement and pleasure of learning - fathers, mothers, daughters, and sons all learning and growing together. . .God never meant for learning to become a burden, either for children or for parents. He meant it to be a natural, enjoyable part of family life." pg. 55

Are you finding joy in the journey?

And finally, (yes, I'm almost done!)

"The child must think, get at the reason-why of things for himself, every day of his life, and more each day than the day before. Children and parents both are given to invert this educational process. The child asks 'Why?' and the parents answers, rather proud of this evidence of thought in his child. There is some slight show of speculation even in the wondering of 'Why?' but it is the slightest and most superficial effort the thinking brain produces. Let the parent ask "Why?" and the child produce the answer, if he can. After he has turned the matter over and over in his mind, there is no harm in telling him - and he will remember it - the reason why. Every walk should offer some knotty problem for the children to think out - "Why does that leaf float on the water, and this pebble sink?" and so on.  Charlotte Mason, Home Education, 1935

A gentle reminder that we should not be too quick to provide what our kids can or should seek, think about and learn on their own accord.

Chapter by Chapter - Educating the Wholehearted Child Ch. 2

Discipleship. . .Shaping Your Child's Heart

 

Wow - so, so much to absorb! Accordingly, I've upgraded chapter one's analysis from
"It's carries a heap of conviction, a spoonful of guilt and a dash of inadequacy." TO "a mountain of conviction, a bucket of guilt and a cup of inadequacy"! Thank goodness, I don't live next door to the Clarksons, lol!

This chapter - "Discipleship: Shaping Your Child's Heart" - guides you through the concept of *training* your child via the five heartbeats of obedience, discipline, love, protection, and direction.

It is convicting in that it causes me to consider my goals from a biblical perspective: training vs.educating our children, guilt bearing as it shines a *bright* light on so many areas of need, and of course the last cup poured out to reveal my many inadequacies as a parent!!

"What does God's Word have to do with education? Everything!. . . .When you begin to think about how your children learn, you must start where God does. . .with the heart." pg. 25

And here again, the quotes and scriptures in the sidelines are perfect compliments:

"He who knows how to teach a child, is not competent for the oversight of a child's education unless he also knows how to train a child." H. Clay Trumbull, Hints of Child Training, 1890

". . .Training a child's will is bringing such influences to bear upon the child that he is ready to choose or decide in favor of the right course of action. . .The final responsibility of a choice and it's consequences rest with the child, and not the parent. . .Merely to force one's will into submission to the other is. . .an injury to both the one who forces and the one who submits." H. Clay Trumbull, Hints of Child Training, 1890

I thought this was parallel to God's authority over our own lives - He leads not by force, but through loving guidance and the teaching of His word, he still allows us the freedom to make our own choices and bear the consequences thereof.

When I considered the veracity of all that was laid out before me in this chapter, I had to sadly and reluctantly confess that I am much more confident in my ability to "teach" from an academic standpoint than to train from a "spiritual" standpoint. I myself, am still in need of training :) and I found myself humbled - as a wife, a parent, and a person.

So when they close out the chapter with . . ."your children will want to become only as mature as you are willing to become. Jesus taught, - "A student is not above his teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher" Luke 6:40. You can be sure I was brought to my knees in prayer.

Lastly, I share these quotes as food for thought:

"Parents, do you wish to see your children happy? Take care, then, that you train them to obey when they are spoken to, - to do as they are bid. . .Teach them to obey while young, or else they will be fretting against God all their lives long, and wear themselves out with the vain idea of being independent of His control." J.C. Ryle, British minister and author, from The Upper Room, 1888

"How many parents there are. . .who are readier to provide playthings for their children than to share in the delights of their children with those playthings; readier to set their children at knowledge-seeking than to have a part in their children's surprises and enjoyments of knowledge-attaining; readier to make good, as far as they can, all losses to their children, than to grieve with their children over those losses. And what a loss of power to those parents as parents, is this lack of sympathy with their children as children." H. Clay Trumbull, Hints of Child Training, 1890

Yes, so much to absorb ;-)

 

 

Chapter by Chapter - Educating the Wholehearted Child Ch. 1

Home Education. . .A Step of Faith Toward Home

This book is just packed full of info. . .hmmm, where to start? Okay, how about chapter 1, lol!

First, I love the layout of this book - the related quotes, scriptures, and interesting tidbits that are in the margins offer a nice mini-break while reading the longer passages. A couple that stood out that were in line with part of the Beechick book I mentioned about learning and knowing "how" to learn:

"He is educated who knows how to find out what he doesn't know." George Simmel, German Philosopher

"Therefore, teaching, talk and tale, however lucid or fascinating, effect nothing until self-activity be set up; that is, self-education; the rest is mere veneer laid on the surface of a child's nature. Charlotte Mason, A Philosophy of Education, 1925

The Clarkson's definitely hold very strong religious beliefs about homeschooling and offer up numerous reasons and scriptural support for their beliefs. Even as someone who has already chosen to homeschool, I found this chapter somewhat heavy. I guess in part because of the reality that it delivers as they speak about being willing to accept the limitations and sacrifices of homeschooling, as well as valuing the eternal and becoming a servant like Jesus, giving up our own lives for our children. The cost of ministry, the cost of lifestyle, the cost of commitment. It's carries a heap of conviction, a spoonful of guilt and a dash of inadequacy. Ugh.

Certainly being a parent is already a huge task and when you add a commitment to be solely responsibility for your children's education, it seem monumental. This chapter lays they out very well with contrasting charts examining homeschooling vs. ps in the areas of academic/education, socialization, and teacher-child relationships.

One thing this chapter makes clear is that homeschooling is not easy, nor should it be entered into lightly. However, once that decision has been made, the Clarkson offer up encouragement and assurance that you CAN do it and that, YES, you are qualified!

I liked the note at the end of the chapter that acknowledged the fact that even the best and most solid reasons and arguments for homeschooling, will not carry you very far *on their own*.

"When you're up to your eyeballs with children, housework, home business, activities, responsibilities, bills, broken appliances, car trouble, and you-don't know-the-troubles-I-seen, those nicely reasoned arguments are going to ring pretty hollow. When you are pushed to the limits, only a tested and seasoned faith will take you beyond." pg. 22

And one last quote I enjoyed:

"I would rather my child had a limited education and access to limited educational resources, and yet learned by basking in the atmosphere of someone who had true pleasure in the books that were pursued, than that he should go to some well-equipped and soulless situation where, theoretically, he could 'learn' at optimum speed." Susan Schaeffer Macaulay (For the Children's Sake, 1984)

Challenging, Inspiring reading! If you'd like to learn more about the author and their ministry visit:  Wholeheart Ministries

Introducing. . .Chapter by Chapter

I haven't posted in almost a month, but if you read the end of my post on July 27th, you probably have a good idea why. Sickness with this pregnancy has been MISERABLE and overwhelming. I am praying daily to feel "normal" again - you know. . .a day without nausea and vomiting. Ugh.

Anywho, I want to introduce a new series I'll be doing here on my blog called "Chapter by Chapter. In these posts I will be sharing highlights and summaries from some of my favorite homeschooling and parenting books "chapter by chapter". I'll begin with Educating the Wholehearted Child, as I've read this one a few times and have some thoughts prepared to share (plus a newly revised edition is due out this year and I'll be rereading that soon too!). I'll continue with For the Children's Sake, followed by Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit, then perhaps A Mother's Heart, and we'll go from there. If you'd like to read along and share your thoughts via the comment link, I'd love to hear from you.

If you have books to suggest, please share those as well! You can see some of my favorites by clicking the "Homeschool and Parenting Favorites" on the homepage.